The wonders of the enveloping hug
My wife and I recently played this wonderful game called “Preach My Praise Now.” One thing struck me that came out of that. It seems that the hug, and not just any hug, but the ‘wraparound’ hug, is at the top of his list of “things I’d miss if I wasn’t around”.
This is the kind of hug that can take place vertically, but is best ‘done’ horizontally. It is the hug that communicates safety and security. There is nothing erotic about it; in fact, it is the very symbol of marital intimacy and unity.
For the boy, it is the opportunity to provide physical and emotional warmth. The lady receives. She communicates things that words cannot and works stealthily to cure many ailments.
One thing required: time
The only tangible requirement to perform this hug correctly is time, since hugs like these are not momentary acts.
Why hold each other for just a minute or two when ten or twenty or thirty lay at bay?
When a male partner spends his time in the relationship in a prolonged embrace maneuver, he is given a lot up front: he is seeding a power in the relationship that cannot be measured. Of course, this doesn’t come naturally to most men (I self-identify). Men should understand that the wraparound hug is a major dialect of many women’s physical love language.
The aspects of time cannot be escaped. It is a requirement that it be delivered. That time would be considered a luxury and not something counted, that is the point of view.
Once the time is given and the hug takes precedence, then the miracle can happen. The pair becomes the ‘matched set’; one fit.
Cuddling Dates and the Timelessness of Intimate Moments
Imagine going out of your way to have a cuddling date. Sure, cuddle maneuvers can happen instinctively all the time, but taking time out to engage in a cuddle session… what could come of that?
And this is the point. When we go into these kinds of events to regain intimacy, we do so with no expectations of what might happen, and we also do so with an open mind.
Timelessness is an open mind and vice versa.
An open mind prepares the heart to receive as the mind gives without thinking of itself. Time seems null and void when both partners are in this space. Thus it becomes the nexus point of the union. Nothing interrupts the marital agenda and both are free to explore intimacy as dictated by the collective imagination.
Copyright (c) 2011 SJ Wickham.
